Let me preface with this: I in no way mean offense to any woman reading this–this is my truth and my life. I respect yours more than you know.
I have graduated from college with an excellent degree and got a job that not only pays the bills but teaches me, but what it all boils down to for me is this:
My only real dream is to be a mom. The only one.
(And I’m an unmarried college graduate.)
I have other dreams, like to become a published author, to blog full-time, to renovate and fix up an old house…but this truth…it’s something I’ve known for years, probably since I was eight or nine years old. It’s like God planted a seed deep in my heart, one that has swollen and sprouted throughout my life, one that whispers: “Your life purpose is to become a mother.”
It’s something that I’ve only embraced halfway, because the society that we live in allows for nothing less than powerful businesswomen, successful and highly educated and power suits. And to those women–I say thank you, for changing the world and breaking down barriers and stereotypes and glass ceilings. You rock.
But I feel compelled to speak to the other women, the women like me, who have a gut feeling that their true calling is to raise babies, I feel compelled to say–our dream is just as valid.
Somewhere in history between all women at home and all women working on Wall Street, America has seemed to strip us of the option to dream to become a mother. It’s somehow seen as regressing, moving backward instead of forward.
But hear me: I don’t care if I ever make six figures. In my heart, I don’t care one iota about moving up and up in a company.
And also hear this: My soul would absolutely crumble if I never have the chance to become a mother, whether biologically or through adoption, or both. I believe it’s what I was born to do.
My friends can vouch for me. I constantly “mother” them, making them food even when they said they aren’t hungry (I just know they are), cuddling them when they are sad, playing with their hair, scratching their backs, giving them advice (coughsometimesunsolicitedcough), praying for them, hoping the best for them, being disappointed or overly upset when they make a decision that I feel will hurt them.
This is not to say that I won’t be both a mom and a businesswoman. Or a mom and a writer. Or a mom and a blogger. Or a mom and all three (hopefully not this option). I know it takes a lot financially to raise a family; I realize that I may have to work or want to work or both when I have children. And even though there’s no way that I could predict now what God has for me in the future, I am absolutely positive that He will make me a mother–in His way–in His time–according to His plan.
If you’re reading this as a woman with big dreams outside of the home, if you dream of becoming a CEO, or starting a nonprofit, or finding the cure for cancer, your head may be a bit boggled by my reality. But just as you have a passion for your dreams, and God-given gifts to help bring them to fruition, I have deep-rooted passion for becoming a mom–even though I’m not married yet!
I get told on a weekly basis that I’ll be a good mom. Sometimes more frequently than that. And even though that is still many years in the future, the people who tell me that are right. I will be a good mom (not a perfect one by any stretch of the imagination)…
…after all, it’s what I was made for.
If you’d like to chat about this post or anything else, please feel free to email me at [email protected].